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Undoubtedly it can be very hard to develop a perfect matrimonial bond but some tips and tricks can surely help you maintain a healthy and strong marital relationship. Marriages are like plants; they require constant nurturing and care. It’s a common fact that the relationship you hold with your significant other affects the course of your life the most. Not everyone can take a sudden getaway trip with their partner to rejuvenate their relationship every other month. Sometimes things have to be managed on a lower scale with much more dedication. Don’t expect to be on amazing terms with your partner if you’re both not vigilant on working on your relationship after years of being together. It requires years and years of practice to build a strong bond with someone you’re supposed to spend your life with and its most intimate moments. Now, without any more delay let’s take a look at the top tips for a healthy and strong marital relationship. Just grab a notebook with a pen and start taking notes right about now!
Self Discovery Paves The Way
How do you expect yourself to have a peaceful married life when you personally don’t feel at peace. Sometimes, it’s better to put in some effort in fixing your own self instead of finding pricks in one’s marriage. Your physical or psychological status plays a great amount of role in your interactions with others. Not working on a dysfunctional mental state can harm your relationship with your partner and even worse; result in divorce or separation. Couples with healthy relationships always compliment each other instead of completing each other. So, instead of entirely relying on your partner to fix things magically, take yourself into perspective and fix the things that require fixations.
Moreover, it’s your job to understand what you want from a relationship. It’s only when you’ll understand your needs, you’ll able to voice these needs to your partner later on. If there’s any traumatic event that continues to haunt you in the present ignoring may lead to your matrimonial relationship’s destruction. So, needless to say, you must work on yourself before working on an actual relationship.
Emotional Intimacy Can Be A Game Changer
Intimacy is a word that is often linked to its physical undertones but there’s more to it. Emotional intimacy is something that often remains neglected in most relationships. Give your partner a chance to express their perspective in the middle of an argument. This can not only build trust but also give your partner the confidence to express their emotions in front of you. Men in general are more likely to keep their emotions in check from the fear of being laughed at. So, give your husband the safe space to let his heart out. You can also work on the emotional intimacy levels between you and your partner by following these pointers;
Compliment your partner every day
Celebrate every happy occasion or minor success
Avoid sharing your partner’s secrets or personal information with others
Spend more time together
Seek couple’s therapy
Try something new together
Prioritize your partner’s physical needs
Share personal experiences with each other
Avoid holding grudges against each other
Express what you actually feel instead of faking emotions
Don’t Just Forgive, Learn How To Forget
Holding grudges can demolish your relationship in the worse way possible. Yes, it’s absolutely essential to forgive your partner for their mistakes but forgetting those mistakes is even more important. Reminding your partner about their old mistakes during newer arguments can worsen your relationship. Undergoing couples therapy is a great way to get a hold over this problem as it can give you the closure you desperately need to move on. Furthermore, avoid acting all high and mighty after forgiving your partner for any follies or taunting them in the future. Only when you’ll bury the hatchet deep into the ground you’ll be able to move on to better things.
Always Try To Look At The Bright Side
While in your honeymoon phase you might have heard older couples admitting that “things don’t stay the same always”. Undoubtedly that is absolutely true but one can always skillfully manage things by looking at the brighter side. If your significant other was more attentive towards you before getting married or in the earlier years of your marriage, he possibly won’t pay that sort of attention later on. One way or another this might lead to further arguments as one partner starts feeling that the other partner isn’t that invested in their relationship anymore. If you ever seem to find yourself on the edge of contemplating separation try compiling a list of the best qualities you can find in your partner. Fact-checking such qualities can be a reminder of the good times and the reasons why you married the person you are married to.
You can only tackle this situation by actualizing that things don’t always stay the same. It’s an inevitable fact that things change, people change and situations change. After having kids or evolving further in one’s professional career multiple things demand attention at the same time. Henceforth, it’s essential to understand that the entire world doesn’t revolve around you. Another commonplace issue among older or middle-aged couples is that one partner seems to have completely let go of themselves physically. So, instead of shaming your s/o for that, you can look into other qualities you find desirable in your significant other.
Negotiation or Squabbling?
You can either waste days without talking to each other or sort something out within minutes. Hence, the direction your relationship will take is entirely dependent upon your intuition and willingness to make things work. Couples can manage any argument without the unusual amount of squabbling and coming right to the point. So, make sure that in-tune with the following suggestions;
- Stay specific: Instead of running around the topic come straight to the point. Try using precise words instead of criticizing your partner repeatedly on their inability to understand what you’re trying to say.
- Admit your follies: Once you understand that you were the one at fault, admitting your mistake can push the rehabilitation of your relationship into motion. Don’t try to act over smart by playing the victim in such situations as this would only lead to more trouble. Furthermore, admitting your faults in front of your partner will also give him/her a brief look at your better judgment and empathy towards them.
- Don’t run in circles: Starting a single argument can often lead up to previously held grudges. So, instead of running back to old arguments try to sort out the issue at hand. Later on, you can move back to the aforementioned problem and sort it out with a more stable mindset.
Spirituality and Religion
Religion and Spirituality are great ways to connect with people; be it the person you’re married to. Both of these topics are highly important to some people and if you share similar beliefs with your partner it can help you build a much stronger bond. Try attending church services with your partner every weekend as it gives you a chance at doing something you adore every week. Holding debates on religious topics can also create a sense of coherence among married couples. That’s because it can make you aware of your partner’s stance on various religious topics or issues.
Furthermore, if you’re both not the religious type exploring spirituality can be a great option. Sitting in the same rejuvenating space can place both you and your partner in similar mind space. You can try exploring yoga or any other meditative practice for this purpose. Attending yoga classes also gives you and your significant other an occasion to socialize with other people even under a very tight schedule which is good for your relationship. Another great advantage of trying meditative practices is that they’re good for mental health and can lower down stress levels. The better you’ll feel mentally the more positive interactions you’ll have with the important people around you. Consequently, your psychological health will remain optimal and won’t be taking a toll on your personal life.
Nagging Has Never Done Anyone Any Good
Matrimony is a relationship that binds two people all together for eternity but this particular reason shouldn’t be overused for one’s own advantage. Your partner and you deserve personal space of your own. Unusual amounts of poking around and nagging can only create a wall between you and your partner. So, avoid unusual amounts of scooping around their tech devices or socializing accounts. If you’re under the impression that your partner might cheating on you, ask them directly about it instead of exploiting their privacy. If your partner starts feeling like you’re too invested in playing the cat and mouse game, it may lead to long-term resentment.
Furthermore, give your significant other some time and space to relax after they return from work instead of annoying them with regular chatter all at once. Don’t force your partner to cut down ties with someone you don’t like in their friend’s circle. Consequently, you won’t be invading their personal space or altering their sense of freedom. The base of a good relationship is deep-rooted in privacy and the perfect amount of control. So, it’s better to remain vigilant in your approach towards both of these factors because you might’ve heard; Excess of anything can be bad.
Therapy and Professional Expertise
Don’t let the general societal opinion around seeking couples therapy scare you away from this option. Seeking counseling and therapy can help you and your partner get over any strong grudges or any deep-rooted issues. It’s recommended to seek therapy if;
There’s a communication gap between you and your significant other
A couple intends to work on their marriage instead of separating
You and your partner are struggling with a huge conflict
Your partner’s cheated on you in the past
You and your partner feel distant from each other
There’s a sudden lack of physical intimacy between a couple
You and your partner have gone through a big change (childbirth, miscarriage, etc.)
There are financial disagreements between a couple
Show Genuine Interest In Each Other
Adopting a friendly approach to marriage can save you a lot of effort. In short, you’re supposed to genuinely act like your significant other’s ultimate well-wisher. Make it one of your most essential purposes to be a strong and nurturing presence in your partner’s life. This can be done by paying attention to what your partner finds pleasing and what your partner’s aspirations are. Having someone to back you up in any area of life, acts as a protective blanket for most people. You’re not supposed to act like a “yes-mam” as it gives the impression of a faker to anyone. Try utilizing constructive criticism in your conversations about your partner’s aspirations. This effort can show that you’re actually mentally invested in something that your partner likes.
Henceforth, when you genuinely pay interest in what your partner desires and support them it makes them feel a bit more worthy. This can be done by asking your significant other questions and opinions on various topics. You can also listen to their plans regarding future aspirations or their professional career without interrupting them. While you’re showing this kind of support your partner will definitely find the effort to place equal effort in your relationship and towards you.
Creating a positive space within your house requires mutual effort. So, you can’t really expect a relationship to work if both parties aren’t mutually agreed on making things work. You’ve got to remain vulnerable in front of your partner and dedicate time as well as effort if you’re in it for the long run. We hope that the aforementioned tips and advice help you accomplish what you’re missing in your matrimonial relationship. But, if the problem still continues to flourish seeking professional help from earlier mentioned professional resources can surely lessen your worries in the long run.